Well, I was in quite a mood, I must say. Rare form indeed. I was having a grand old time when a few of my employees showed up (can you believe they trust me with employees?? 30 of 'em no less!)
Anyway, my employee-friends and I were sitting at a little table, enjoying some fresh fruit and sandwiches when I saw some guy come into the tent. I yelled, "hey man, how's it going?!" Of course, I had no idea who this person was, until he came about 5 feet closer.
I then thought, "oh shit."
Needless to say, this gentleman worked in our building in a different department a short age ago and was quite fond of me. And quite strange in his affections towards various women and rice krispy treats.
He, of course, sat down. Awkward indeed. He stared at me a bit. I said hello, he asked how he knew me, I explained. He then asked me to take off my hat. Big no no for the Jessinator. I had hat head and said no, somewhat politely. He also asked me to take off my sunglasses. No again.
He then asked who I was sitting with. I introduced these employee-friends as "my minions" (I've been known to do so from time to time and they seem to enjoy it. No seriously, a couple said they did).
Anywho, he slowly looked me up and down. Stopping at my breast region, responded with a "I wish I could be your minion."
Shit man! What the hell was that.
My response, "Thanks, that was inappropriate, but kind." With a gentle arm nudge away.
His response, "Why?"
My response, "Nice seeing you again, man. Take care." Another gentle but more to the point arm nudge away.
My minions had no idea what to do.
Brian's response, "What the hell was that?"
Marlee's response, laughter.
Sean's response, laughter with a tinge of irritation and embarrassment.
Needless to say, what I took away was this:
Make sure to really look at the person before you are verbosely nice. It will save you from breast stares and sexual harassment shots.
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